Judge. Reflect. Understand.

judging vs understanding

It is common for people to share on social media nowadays, the desire to not be judged.

However, it is impossible. Everyone is judging everyone on a daily basis. In our daily attempts to reduce uncertainty, we utilise whatever information is readily accessible to us and make assumptions. We want to have a feeling of those around us so that we know how to act or behave around them.

It is okay to judge. It is natural to want to understand others and sometimes we only have so much information to work with. As a result, we make our own personal judgements of others and use it as a template. The important thing is that we must never allow ourselves to stick to a single judgement and refuse to change. We need to be open to revisions of our judgements on people as we find out more about them. Simply avoiding someone based on first impressions and isolating him despite his efforts to try to be better is nothing but disrespectful.

The act of judging is normal and nothing wrong. It is narrow-minded judgements that refuse to change that is wrong. To think that one’s perspective of someone is irrefutable despite only having seen one side of him or her is nothing but arrogance.

A person’s personality is not something you can figure out based on a single occasion, to truly understand and know someone, you need to spend a lot of time with them. You need to be willing to listen to his or her perspectives and be more observant of how they react to the words you speak and the actions you take. Even then, people are constantly changing and what may once have been true in the past may not hold true as time goes on.

It takes a lifetime to truly understand someone. Do not think you know all about them just because you spent a little time with them. Just as Kiran said,

“Do not judge my story by the chapter you walked in on.”

– K.A.L.T


Right now I’m surrounded by very nice and friendly people, however, many of them often talk about others as though they know everything about them. While I have fun spending time with them, it makes me wonder what they say about me behind my back. At times, I also wonder whether I should stop them from saying bad things about others. However, I cannot help but question if there is some truth to what they say. Even if they may simply be judging other’s based on their own experiences with them, that does not mean what they say definitely holds no truth. When they speak of others, they substantiate it with evidence and reasons why they feel that someone is doing things wrong or behaving inappropriately. Do you think that sometimes other’s judgements, while they may be negative, could help you become a better person? Could they possibly help you realise something about yourself and what you could do to improve as a person? Share your thoughts in the comments below. 🙂

 

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1 reply »

  1. The behaviour/actions/opinions of others are their concern not ours; we can certainly offer advice if we’re asked for it but criticising others because their standards don’t meet our own is never a good idea in my experience

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