In Natsume Yuujinchou, a youkai’s memories of Natsume’s grandmother flowed into his mind. In its memories, Natsume Reiko, his grandmother, said, “If you’re alone, you don’t have to protect them right?”
Natsume thought about her words and said, “If I’m alone, I don’t have to protect anyone. But just like the people who I want to protect have helped me, without my ever knowing it, I’m sure there were many friends around her who cared about her.”
It really made me think. I always tried to distance myself from others because I feared to be a burden, an annoyance. I’m not strong and reliable enough to befriend those around me. I cannot bear the burden of maintaining relationships with others. As a result, I often end up alone because it is much less stressful… much more… peaceful.
However, upon watching this scene in Natsume’s Book of Friends, I came to realise that while I was so worried about whether I was a good enough friend, whether I was helping my friends enough, they were likely already helping me. Despite the fact that I tried not to share my problems with them, they tried to help me in their own ways which I likely could not recognise. If they do not know my problems, how would they be expected to react in ways we expect? Even so, their help likely made my life easier even if I did not recognise it. Perhaps simply making short conversations with me in hopes of not disturbing me but just trying to make me feel a little less lonely since I’m often seen alone.
We never know whether we are truly alone unless we first dare to open up and let the people who care into our lives. Overestimating oneself, thinking that you have to protect your friends and always be the reliable one is a mistake. Friends help each other without expecting anything in return. Just because you cannot protect or help out your friends in various things due to your inability to do so, does not mean that they do not want to help you.
Friends care for you not because of what you can do for them. They care for you because of who you are to them.
Do you feel that you are isolated and alone? Do you believe that no one cares for you? Perhaps that may be the case, however, I’d like to believe otherwise. Even if there is no one physically around you to be there for you, there could be people suffering the same way as you who can relate to you. People who you could possibly lean on. People who are far away yet contactable due to the power of the Internet.
Comment your thoughts below. 🙂