Posted in Music Suggestions

Song Lyric Sunday: Radio

Honestly, when I first saw the theme for this week, “Record/Juke Box/DJ/Radio”, I was at a complete loss as to what song to share. Fortunately, the theme is released in advance, so I had time to search for a nice song that fits the theme. After quite a bit of searching, I found a “Kowarekake no Radio”. However, I did not particularly enjoy the original but was happy to find that Goosehouse had done a cover.

The lyrics of the song portrays one who has likely done what some people long to do. To move far away and have a “fresh start”. However, contrary to the happiness one would think they would get by starting anew, they grow to miss the things they had in the past. The people who they met, the experiences they shared as well as fragments of happiness in which they never really took notice of. Upon moving on, there is more left behind than new opportunities that arise. It is impossible to restart mid-way in life, running away only makes us as far from our past as your future.

How could the dreams and “true happiness” we have desired for so long suddenly appear to be so far? Songs from the past that play from records, Jukeboxes and in this case, the radio, forces us to reminisce about the past. It makes us wonder where we strayed, where we lost our way as we grew older into mature adults. Was it when we could no longer hear the songs from the broken radio? When we no longer had a guiding light or song filled with hopes and dreams? When reality took precedence over the ideals of our young hopeful selves?

In the end, just like the broken radio, perhaps, we have become broken as well through the course of life. No longer innocent, no longer hopeful. Anything positive has been left in the past.

Image from Pixabay

Thus, this week’s song choice for Song Lyric Sunday is “Kowarekake no Radio” (Broken Radio). Originally done by Tokunaga Hideaki. However, in this post, I am sharing the cover done by Goosehouse.

Official Upload By Goosehouse

Eng Subbed AMV

English Translation
I can’t hear anything, you won’t let me hear anything
Is that because, since then, my body has grown into that of a mature adult? On my bed, my first ever black radio lies
Countless melodies raised memories of the past
Through adolescence, boys turn to adults
I searched for a way, while still innocent and pure
Without getting dressed, I pushing through the crowd
Tell me what real happiness is, my broken radio

I could always hear it, you always let me hear it
When I looked out the window at the sky, I felt a new, faint courage
My radio knew you knocked on the door of my heart
To my broken heart, a gentle breeze waved goodbye
After the brilliant festival, I turned my back on the now silent town
And looked up at the stars, as I was still so innocent
The sky of my hometown, growing far away;
the crowd of people I can’t go back to
Tell me what real happiness is, my broken radio

I was playing the guitar without knowing the next chord.
In the dreams in which I was lost,
a beautiful song showed me the way
Through adolescence, boys turn to adults
I searched for a way while still innocent and pure
Without dressing up, I pushed through the crowd
Tell me what “true happiness” is, my broken radio

After the brilliant festival, I turned my back on the now silent town
And looked up at the stars, as I was still so innocent
The sky of my hometown, growing far away;
the crowd of people I can’t go back to
Tell me what “real happiness” is, my broken radio

The overflowing dreams fade away,
the people who can never return,
Tell me what “real happiness” is, my broken radio

Translated by me with reference to project-imas for the first half of the song.
I’m not Japanese nor do I know the language well so if I made any mistakes please feel free to correct me.
Note: “Without dressing up, I pushed through the crowd” might actually be “I pushed through the crowd with no decent place to go” according to project-imas but I’m not too sure.

Posted in Inspired By Life, My Thoughts

Do we really want to be satisfied?

Many of us go about our daily lives with a goal in mind. Or perhaps for the more ambitious, goals. However, as much as we want to accomplish the said goal and feel the satisfaction and sense of fulfilment… What comes after that? As someone who has been fortunate to live a rather comfortable life without having to worry about not having the essentials to get by on a day to day basis, I feel that satisfaction can be an unwanted feeling.

I know it sounds weird but please hear me out. To feel satisfied or fulfiled would mean that one no longer feels the need to continue to work hard. Why? Because you would already have accomplished your goal.

The result would be a crushing sense of emptiness until one finds a new goal. In the end, while it may be frustrating to go through a long and difficult struggle to reach one’s goal, at the very least, it keeps us busy. It keeps forcing us to work hard towards our goal. Our desire to accomplish our task pushes us and gives us a sense of purpose and meaning.

For me, I’ve been fortunate enough to have had the opportunity to try many things and gain satisfaction from them. For example, working hard in my studies to get decent grades, editing quotes onto anime pictures, writing and editing/subbing videos. However, as much satisfaction that I have gained from the above activities, I never fail to be left with a sense of emptiness and meaninglessness upon the completion of each task.

After years of studying hard and getting relatively good grades, eventually, it stopped meaning so much. After feeling a sense of satisfaction after receiving my ‘O’ Level results, I never felt as motivated to study ever again. Perhaps it was due to my new school environment when I entered Junior College. However, I’m convinced that the fact that I achieved the results I desired for my ‘O’ Level examinations also contributed to my attitude in Junior College where I no longer felt as driven to work hard.

It is the same for my other endevours such as editing quotes onto anime pictures and writing. Once I felt the satisfaction of many likes, comments and follows for my Instagram anime quote edits account, after a while, I grew bored of it. I no longer feel the same level of satisfaction any more. Editing turned from a hobby to nothing more than something I do whenever I feel like it (not often). It’s the same for writing, I used to write so regularly, but now, I struggle to write just two posts a week. Why? I’ve already felt the satisfaction from people appreciating my work, liking and commenting, albeit merely a select few. My brain is stagnant. It doesn’t even know what to think anymore. I merely exist as the days go by doing whatever I need to do to survive and holding on to my identity as an “anime fan” or “light novel reader”. Whenever I want to delve into more profound thoughts, my brain just stops because thinking about such things no longer gives as much satisfaction as it used to. Many times, I find myself wanting to just clear my mind to make it easier to go through the motions of living.

You can probably guess what became of my hobby of editing/subbing videos. After feeling the satisfaction of editing/subbing about ten videos, the satisfaction and sense of fulfilment from completing another video decreased drastically. Looking for the right scenes you to fit the music, finding the exact timing for the subs to appear according to the 0.001 second gets tiresome after awhile. The sense of accomplishment of doing something new fades with time (the more you do it).

In the end, satisfaction is like a cursed feeling that causes one to lose motivation to continue in their endeavours. At least, that has been what I’ve experienced so far. To feel satisfied and fulfiled makes it difficult for one to find any reason to continue because well, you are satisfied. There is no reason to continue. In that sense, I guess what I should wish for, is to have an insatiable desire to do one specific thing. In other words, what I need, is a passion in which I can commit myself to. Not like everything else that I grow bored of or tire of as time goes by.

Satisfaction is not a feeling I want to feel, yet it is something I have been blessed with. Perhaps, though it may be insensitive to say this, those who struggle through hardships in their daily lives, those who struggle to satisfy their needs on a daily basis, are the fortunate ones who can truly live their lives without worrying about meaningless things like the meaning or purpose of their lives. As they single-mindedly focus on living the best they can with what they have, perhaps they are the ones, who lead the most fulfiling lives.

Original Image from Pixabay
Edited by me using PicsArt and Phonto

On a side note, I recommend checking out “Only Radiant DNA” by zutomayo.

There are English captions but I prefer the translation from here

I feel that this song may actually be more concise and also more clearly convey what I’m trying to say in this post ^^”

I still do everything I mentioned in the post, however, at a far lower frequency as compared to when I first started. However, they have merely become ways to kill time or as I mentioned, things I just so happen to feel like doing sometimes. Not exactly for the satisfaction of completing the task, but just to go through the process of doing the task.

I’m sorry if I didn’t make much sense in this post or if I wasn’t being very coherent with everything I said. As I mentioned, it’s been getting more and more difficult for me to think too deeply into things as of late.

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Posted in Music Suggestions

Song Lyric Sunday: Time

Okay, first, the actual theme for this week’s Song Lyric Sunday is “Minutes/Hours/Days/Weeks/Months”. It’s just that I felt that it was too long to be put into the title, so I summarised it into the single term “time”. Please don’t fault me too much for it.

Anyways, as minutes, hours, days, weeks and eventually months, pass us by, we live by in idleness or in the busyness of daily life without much thought. Our days may be empty and worthless or eventful and purposeful. Or perhaps a somewhat unusual but not unheard of combination of eventful yet worthless.

Original Image from Pixabay
Edited by me using PicsArt and Phonto

Each new day brings about new opportunities for those with ambition. For others, a new day merely brings about more of life’s sorrows as they drag their feet to continue living. Depending on the person, we may look forward to or dread our seemingly endless days that come to pass as time marches on no matter what our feelings are. Some take life for granted while others can be carefree because they feel or think that maybe, they wouldn’t mind dying early. Of course, such sentiments cannot be confirmed until the time of our imminent death comes. Some may realise that they want to live after being on the verge of death. Some may realise that they have led such purposeful and eventful lives that they wouldn’t mind dying as much as they thought they would. We never know how the minutes, hours, days, weeks and months that pass can change us. What we experience within that period has the ability to change us whether we feel willing to change or not.

Every day is a blank canvas on which we draw our experiences anew as they come to pass. Minute by minute. Hour by hour. Day by day. Week by week. Month by month. Eventually, year by year.

My song choice for this week is “もう一度” (One More Time) by amazarashi.

Official Channel
No Eng Subs

English Translation Ver #1

Ignoring all my job interviews, I lie in bed angry and watch the rain clouds go by.
Getting fat on cans of beer, I throw out the empty ones along with my dreams.
I gave up somewhere along the way, and now I live like I’m not even here.
I’ve become so empty, I’ve completely lost sight of myself.

I made countless excuses for why my girl still hasn’t come back to me.
I stopped caring about what I could do, and then I stopped caring about anything.
I’ve felt this feeling before, more times than I care to remember.
I always end up chasing away everything that matters to me.

The rain hasn’t stopped since yesterday. And I can’t let it all end like this.
Not defeat, not failure, not even despair are worthy nemeses.
I have always lost to myself, but I still think there’s a chance for me yet.
If there’s one thing I know better than anyone, it’s how weak I am.

One more time! One more time! There’s no way that the future we drew up,
From the very bottom of our useless souls is useless in and of itself.
One more time! One more time! So I can say “Don’t you mess with me!”
To the yesterdays that kept threatening us, I will keep rising to my feet.
One more time!

There’s no hope or salvation here. If you understand then go do something about it.
You’re telling me that the past was so great? You’re just waving the white flag in defeat.
Wherever a shadow is cast, there must be a light shining nearby.
No matter where you’re at in life, misery is never guaranteed.

The rain hasn’t stopped since yesterday. And I didn’t bring my umbrella.
What a bitter reality! The weather’s always beating me down!…
is what we would say if we gave up now, so to that we’ll just have to say “Who cares?”
And to everyone fighting far away, don’t you break on me now!

One more time! One more time! There’s no way the tears we’ve been shedding,
When our stupid hopes are made out to be stupid, are pointless in and of themselves.
One more time! One more time!

So I can say “Don’t you mess with me!”
Right back to the world that always laughed at us, I will keep rising to my feet.
One more time! The sound of pouring rain resonates within the walls of the quiet room.
Maybe I just can’t go anywhere else. Or maybe I just won’t go somewhere else.
Covered in dreams, hopes, and scars, we tried to laugh together, but she wasn’t laughing at all.
You’re always empty in the beginning.
One more time! One more time!

Every time they crush me, I’ll grit my teeth.
“I’ve finally made it all the way here. There’s no questioning it anymore.”
One more time! One more time! So that I can say “Just look at me now!”
To the hopes that I’d lost so long ago, I will never stop rising to my feet.
One more time!

Taken from lyricstranslate.

For those who don’t mind vocaloid songs, I think that “The World’s Lifespan and the Last Day” is rather appropriate for this week’s theme as well. 🙂

Has Eng Subs

The album with “もう一度” (One More Time) can be bought here.
For more amazarashi albums click here.

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