So earlier this week, my bunkmates were talking about the importance of “first impressions”. They were discussing it rather intensely but it was pretty late at night, so I was pretty lazy to contribute any personal thoughts on the matter. Thus, I held onto my silence and lay in bed with my eyes closed… only to realise that I couldn’t help but think about that very topic.
First impressions are often seen as important by many. As one of my bunkmates pointed out, it is what makes people feel the urge or desire to get to know you better. If they don’t have a good first impression of you, unless they are forced to continue interactions with you due to the circumstances, they would likely avoid you passively or make an outward effort to isolate you if they are aggressive, sadists, bullies or people who are too honest with their hate towards others.
Despite the fact that first impressions are not always accurate (I don’t have enough experience to know whether it’s more often than not true or false), people who are quick to judge or simply value their time, only wanting to spend time with those who they deem worthy of their precious time, will continue to live by first impressions as their first line of “defense” (filtering out those irrelevant to them). As they continue their interactions with others, they will then decide whether to persist in their friendship or throw them aside.
While it seems harsh and cold-hearted, I feel that it is something that most people do. Whether or not they notice it or not. As humans, we are naturally drawn to different individuals as we unconsciously decide who we want to get along with and those who we couldn’t particularly care about unless forced into specific situations.
From this, I guess you could say that first impressions, while it allows others to want to get to know you better, is not something that enables long-lasting relationships. It is something obvious, yet, not said enough as the statement “First impressions are important.”
It is easy enough to make a good first impression, however, to keep it up daily is far from easy. (another obvious statement)
I guess what I’m trying to say is that we should not let first impressions stop us from getting to know others. If we have to work with each other daily, whether or not your first impression was good or not, if you have it in you, it would likely benefit you to be willing to interact with those whom you had a negative first impression. Some people’s personalities can be very different depending on how close you are to them after all…
The only real way to tell whether you can get along with someone is to spend more time with them. In our modern lives, such opportunities are abundant. In school, army, universities and at work. We are constantly forced to interact with other people. Only through these continuous interactions, would we be able to have an accurate enough impression of others that’s worth to keep in mind.
In conclusion, I guess all I’m trying to say is, first impressions are, to a certain extent, important. However, it is no use faking a good first impression just to later be discovered as fake (and detested). Of course, unless you are willing to live a lie. Second, we should not let our first impressions of others stop us from interacting with them. If they approach you and seem to want to get to know you, as you interact with them, you may come to appreciate them more as a person (potentially become friends? Or even close friends perhaps?)
After all, you can never fully understand anyone, including yourself. That is my personal belief.